Dear Mr. Abuser.
Dear Mr. Abuser
Did you ever think what you had done
As you stripped and raped me
When it was time for you to have your fun.
And after you had your fun
How you then beat me black and blue
So Mr. Abuser let me tell you today
How my childhood and adulthood life
Was destroyed because of you.
For over fifty years my life was destroyed
For you were that man that destroyed not just my life
But that of so many other young girls
And that of so many other young boys.
So Mr. Abuser although you are dead
I want you to know about the life I have lead
And how many a night I woke up screaming
With those memory’s of you I was dreaming.
And Mr. Abuser did you know I tried to commit suicide
And for many years protected you with secrets I did hide
And did you know I was locked away in a secure psychiatric hospital
Where I had been sectioned
Yes Mr Abuser I was put in a place like that
For my own protection.
Yes Mr. Abuser you know my words are true
And today I speak up for my brothers and sisters
Who were abused by you
For no more am I one of your children to be abused
For today I am proud to say
I Am A Survivor Of Being A Child Of Sexual Abuse.
My Brothers In Arms.
My brothers in arms we stand side by side
fighting for truth and justice with dignity and pride.
Fighting together we fight so hard fighting for truth and justice
and the memory’s we have scarred.
So come my brothers in arms and lets fight today
for being brothers in arms is our only way.
For no more should a child be abused and harmed
so let us fight for our children as brothers in arms.
Written by, Sandy Smith,
Justice For Children.
Dear Younger Me.
Written by Sandy Smith.
Justice For Children / Fresh Start Foundation.
A Child With A Broken Chain.
In life we all have a chain that is linked From friends and family
We are all linked So how would you feel if your child’s chain was broken
And your child was raped and beaten And there words to you never spoken.
One in four children have there life destroyed And that includes girls and also includes boys
So how long will it take you to understand Every child should be given a helping hand.
Yes I was a child that was raped and beaten And I kept all this locked away Deep inside and deeply hidden
And like being stabbed and scared by a knife I have suffered deeply throughout my life.
So how long will it take you to understand Every child should not suffer as I did
But be given a helping hand So will you just sit there time and time again
Or will you stand up and help a child repair its life That has a broken chain.
Written by Sandy Smith.
Justice For Children.
Child Sexual Abuse
Children; Helpless, and unexpecting. Innocent then innocence taken away. Loving and trusting children being made to Do things against their will and having Sexual things done to them. Evil revealing itself in different ways and X-pecting children not to say anything. an Unkind and uncaring human being torturting A defenseless, innocent child. Long lasting effects of the Abuse is what the survivor will endure all Because some people are just plain sick and Uncaring. full of threat Sexual predators stay away; we wish. there's no Excuse for hurting and sexual abusing a child. https://www.poetrysoup.com/poem/child_sexual_abuse_288930
A Cry For Help
Survivors in Transition
The cold in me warm
From the gentlest touch,
A sign that things transform
When you don’t overthink so much.
I can let someone in because
My presence is now whole,
Each layer is only thin
But I feel in control.
I’ve no idea where this is leading
But after all I’ve endured,
My automatic response is no longer reading;
I’ve emotionally matured?
I’ve allowed myself to be heard
Now I’m familiar with self-worth.
I don’t feel like life is blurred
Because I’m really present on this earth
No warning and I’m gone
My bulletproof walls shoot up
Triggering my total indifference.
Insular is taken to a new level;
I feel trapped by other people’s presence.
I’m missing emotion,
I’m lacking thought.
In that moment there is nothing
Other people’s betrayal pinching frangible skin,
They must have no idea how hard you’re trying to win.
Unintentional bitterness trickling around in veins,
Ready to surface and distort any pain.
Constant twisting of emotional expression,
But having said that this is still progression.
Disillusioned and desperate
Although not in a scrabbling sense,
I’m well seasoned in dissociating
To avoid making new dents.
The present less current than the past,
As I struggle to convince myself to re-ground
Back into living at last.
Realisation dawns as I attempt a soothing speech:
The ‘now’ feels bleak,
The past feels painful,
And the future too far out of my reach.
I comfortably sit in my muted version of existence
Where suicidal thoughts require my resistance.
SARSAS has helped me manage the pain
But what pulls me back time and time again
Is knowing that I have too much to lose
And that ultimately I do still get to choose.